Winning From Within
Negotiation is one of the most fundamental skills for leaders. Most training deals with how to negotiate with other people. I want to talk about negotiation with ourselves--how we get in our own way and miss out on some of life's most meaningful opportunities.
Have any of you ever made a plan and in the moment did something else?
Your performance gap is the distance between what you do at your best and what you actually do in real life practice.
As a leader you need to identify your gaps and work to close them.
One way to explore how to close this performance gap involves looking at yourself in a new way. Most of us think of ourselves as singular but another way is to look at yourself as plural--Walt Whitman said, "I am large. I contain multitudes." Each one of us is more like an orchestra than a soloist. I like to think of these multiple parts as inner negotiators.
The Big Four (this is your own inner top team)
The Dreamer (inner CEO)
The Thinker (inner CFO)
The Lover (inner VP of HR )
The Warrior (Your Inner COO)
The Dreamer--creates possibilities; sets strategic vision; senses a path forward; Gives direction -- look for the dream beneath the dream. Is there a dream in me that I've left behind? Is there a dream I've abandoned because it didn't happen in the specific way I imagined?
The Thinker--Clarifies Perspectives; Analyzes Data; Manages risk; Considers Consequences -- Find some data about evaluating risk
The Lover--Cares about People; feels emotions; manages relationships; collaborates with others. -- Have a practice before you go into a tough meeting and call the name of someone you know and love into your heart.
The Warrior--Catalyzes Performance; Takes action; Reaches goals; Speaks hard truth-- Find some places where you're saying "yes" today and practice saying "no"
These four roles need to work together.
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