Thursday, January 17, 2019

Getting The Point


This is what happens in January and February. I have fantasies of quitting. I lie in bed in the wee hours and think to myself...I'm a volunteer. Nothing says I have to keep doing this job as area coordinator. No one is making my team plan a large shoebox packing party. Really, the sensible thing would be to just quit.

But then, like Reb Tevye in "Fiddler On The Roof" I think..."On the other hand"...  Neither I nor my teammates may get paid for our jobs BUT we have a high calling. If God's still calling me to this I can't quit. I don't dare.

This leads to more prayer and soul searching as I ask God again for His wisdom. Are you calling me to this OCC team? Still? Are you calling us to do a large packing party? Still?

Because if He calls then He'll provide--that I DO KNOW. It's just that things always get a little fuzzy in these bleak months of January and February.

On the other hand...God is already providing. I've been praying for pencils this year. We have 9,000 sets of mechanical pencils donated by a generous team member but we still need about 40,000 more regular pencils and I don't have a source right now.

This week, though, I saw a post about some toys at Walgreens being 90% off. I headed to the Walgreens that's less than a mile from my house. I didn't find any toys but I DID see a rack of discounted pencils. Each pack had 20 pencils for a clearance price of .49.  I loaded them into my cart and went to find a manager to ask if I could get a cheaper price if I bought them all.  The answer to that was "no"...

BUT when they rang up it turns out the school supplies were "Buy 1 get 1 50% off" this week so each pack ended up being 36.5 cents each or about 1.9 cents per pencil.  I try not to pay more than 2 cents for a pencil so that worked out great. I headed to another store later and between the two sites I got a haul of 3,740 pencils.

I have no idea yet what our goal will be for this year's packing party. A lot will depend on what size boxes we'll be given to pack this year and I don't even know when I will know the answer to that question.

I guess the point is I need to follow God one step at a time.  I mean, that's always the point...it's just that sometimes I have trouble even seeing the next step, you know?

I'm still praying for another 36,260 pencils (and a Prayer Ministry Coordinator, and a Community Relations Coordinator, and a Central Drop-Off Team Leader and Central Drop-Off Site and another ten team members would be nice.)

But mostly I'm praying I'll just get the point.

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Same Old...


Here we are--2019! It seems crazy we're nearly two decades into this century when it feels like just days ago we waited for the ball to drop on Y2K--fearing all our computers would crash.

It's a day to evaluate the ups and downs of the past year and set new goals. But I'm not feeling it.

I mean I want to get excited about goals and resolutions but somehow it all feels like the same old struggles just to maintain. When I look back to the year 2000 I was praising God for allowing us to pack a perfect 300 shoeboxes. This year, 18 years later, God blessed us with more than 100 times that many. Incredible!

The truck above showed up just a few weeks ago with a delivery of four pallets of shoebox items we'd prayed over. God granted us a lower price on the items and blessed us by having them delivered on a dry and relatively warm day.  God is still moving on our behalf.


But where do we go from here?  Our team hasn't set a formal goal for our packing party or for our team goal for total shoeboxes but the talk seems to be that we are at a plateau or may even need to step back a few thousand or more. Just trying to maintain what we did this year would be a major feat. We don't have the time, the funds, the storage space, or the volunteer base to move forward. Of course God can do anything. So does it show a lack of trust for us to just maintain? What does God want us to do in the face of so many children who need to know God's love?

Maintaining 30,000 boxes or even pulling back a bit would still be no small feat. Only God can achieve that through our small team with our limited resources. Only God can pull another 30,000 stuffed animals out of this area where we've gleaned them all year after year.

But in terms of goal setting a plateau isn't all that exciting.

In some ways my personal life, too, has long-since peaked and I can't even maintain the goals of the past. Taking running, for example--and I use the term 'running' very loosely. I've been running since 1984 with never more than a week off until the past year. Now I've had several injuries that have not only slowed me down but now have stopped me completely for more than a month. I'm going to physical therapy this week for the first time ever and my hope is to run again--even slowly. But that goal is WAY BEHIND past goals.

I need to face it--things change, my physical body is aging. Some of the struggles will only increase. Still, God's mercies are new every morning. Though my physical body is decaying I can still improve it. I can get back to exercise in some form.

And, spiritually, I can move forward by His grace. I can set goals to memorize Scripture and spend time reading His word.

Yesterday I attended the funeral of a woman just a couple months older than I. She was a faithful servant of the Lord and He ended her race through the crippling disease of ALS. None of us know how many days/months/years God will extend our race but I do have today.

God, will you help me focus on Your hope? Will you help me affirm Your word to Isaiah (43:19) "Behold I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?" Will You help me perceive that "new thing" you want to do in my life and in our team in 2019?

Because I think You want more than "Same. Old."