Saturday, March 11, 2017


I haven't been connecting very well through blogging but God has been bringing lots of connections into my Operation Christmas Child world nevertheless.

The picture above was taken at the end of January at our Mid-Atlantic Area Coordinators' planning weekend. It was a true honor to pray for Dania after she shared her full-circle shoebox story with us. How wonderful to connect with her and hear again of the impact these simple shoeboxes can have.

Meanwhile, God's been bringing us connections with so many volunteers to provide items and manpower for our packing party.  We had a work day on February 22nd and are planning another one in March.  Over 40 people came, including more than a dozen students from Bethel Christian School.

Myron cut the rest of the rope we had and hundreds were tied into jump ropes.

The students worked hard to unbox shoelaces and belts to get them prepared for the packing party while other volunteers stapled paper into packets.

A few new friends from Erie Homes for Children and Adults came to assist us, too...

And in the midst of the chaos there was time to stop and connect in prayer...

Last Saturday brought a really sweet connection when my friend Lisa from Virginia stopped in with these fabulous donations.  She and her three grown children, her sister, and her niece drove up in their minivan for her grandmother's birthday party.  In addition to their luggage they brought nearly 600 beanie babies (all washed and sorted) and over 500 washcloths.  Lisa said her children didn't mind riding with bags of animals under their feet because they love Operation Christmas Child!  This special connection is a real blessing from the Lord.

And the connections continue.  We haven't had any new applications for our team this year, so we're asking God to bring us some new members--especially on our prayer team and our church relations team.

And we're praying for all the countries where so many boxes have already been delivered and for those still waiting to get boxes through customs and into the hands of children...

Because every box is a connection to show a child and family God's love.

Sunday, February 26, 2017

Identity Crisis

There's plenty happening in my shoebox world but I just don't feel like writing about that.  I've been up since 3:00 am and as I sit and watch the snow falling I thought I'd take a chance and spout off about my latest struggles.

When David wrote so many of his psalms were they his own personal journals?  I wonder if he realized they'd be read by millions of people centuries later.    If he understood that would it have made him less candid?  I don't know, but I do know many of us find comfort in reading his honest emotions.

I feel raw and vulnerable and I don't know who to tell so why not post it in a blog?  I'm having some sort of identity crisis that makes me cranky and miserable.  Is this spiritual warfare?  Maybe--but that sounds too lofty for my pitiful turmoil.

Day before yesterday the temperature here in Erie, PA reached a record 77 degrees. The sun shone bright and the air oozed with odors of spring. Yesterday the thermometer plummeted to 25 degrees and the snow started again.  Even the weather can't figure out who it is.

I can't figure out where I fit in and it's driving me crazy.  I can't align with Republican conservatives but I can't fully embrace the tenets of a liberal.

Theologically, I'm not fully aligned with Arminianism nor Calvinism.  I'm trying not to be a Pharisee but can't quite make it to whatever the opposite side would be--maybe Christian Libertarian?

And as I scroll down my Facebook newsfeed filled with posts about new makeup products (I don't use any) and stylish leggings (only wear black and only when running) and Pinterest projects (don't get me started) I wonder if I can even identify with the female gender.  I don't carry a purse for cryin' out loud.

But all that aside, what I struggle with most these days is the elemental question: Who is God?  

Whoa.  It's a big question.  I've wrestled for decades to try to comprehend God's love for me.  I mean, I know He has to love me because He says so over and over in Scripture and He wouldn't lie, right?  And, yes, I've tried reading John 3:16 inserting my name in it to make it personal. To be accurate, there have been many, many times when I've experienced God's love but it never seems to be enough.   Like a greedy toddler I want more.

I recently re-read a fiction story I read some years ago--one that moved me to tears as I felt God genuinely revealed His love to me through it.  But as I've tried to share about that I've been gently rebuked by folks who've pointed out the story is actually heresy because it doesn't show the full character of God--not only His love but His holiness, His judgment.  We can all agree God is incomprehensible so where does that leave us?

God reveals Himself in Scripture, but I'm reading the Old Testament right now--Judges and 1 Samuel have had some great examples of God's holiness and love evidenced in smiting large groups of both enemies and Israelites.  Of course, there was a refreshing break from the killing in the book of Ruth as all the characters who died leaving the women widows seemed to do so less violently.

I guess it's time to refresh my memory and get into the gospels again. I know Jesus is "the image of the invisible God" so maybe if I read the account of His life I'll get a better perspective.

Don't get me wrong; I've studied "Knowing God" by J.I. Packer and other books that highlight God's attributes.  Right now it's not academic knowledge I need.

Maybe I'll read some of my old journals and see the highs and lows I've already experienced in this journey, because eventually I always stumble out of the valley.  At least, by God's grace, I always have.

And if I were David, I'd write--God, if You're listening, come and rescue me from myself.  Selah.  

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Counting Miracles--On The Ball from 2004

I'm thinking today about miracles.  I've been packing Operation Christmas Child shoeboxes for over 22 years now and in those decades God has performed so many miracles to provide each of the items to fill them.  And I'm sure I don't have an inkling of even a portion of them.

Over a decade ago--before the advent of Facebook and blogging--I wrote some of the stories of those miracles.  A few years ago I unearthed some of them and immortalized them in blog posts here, but it's been some time since I posted one.

The miracles then involved tens or hundreds of items whereas God's miracles now tend to range from the hundreds of items to thousands or even tens of thousands.  But each miracle is a story of God's grace and provision--a proof of His goodness.

This morning I prayed again for God's provision for our 2017 packing party and this afternoon I got a text from my friend Lisa who lives out of state but collects stuffed animals for us here in Erie.  She just got a donation of 500 Beanie Babies!  Yep--another miracle.

So...for all of you Walmart shoppers--here's a miracle from 2004 God used to help us pack a total of 1,780 boxes --

Having A Ball-2004
            “Are you a teacher?” the pleasant woman in the line behind me at Wal-Mart inquires, staring at the 112 boxes of crayons stacked in my shopping cart.
            “No,” I chuckle as I launch into my well-practiced reply, “our church packs shoeboxes full of gifts to send to kids in other countries for Christmas.”   I’m used to getting questions about the contents of my shopping cart.
            “Oh, that’s neat.  I wondered what you were doing with all those.”
            I heft the last carton of twenty-four boxes of crayons onto the counter and watch the cashier gamely count the stacked rows.  Soon she finishes and begins to ring up the purchase on her register.  While the machine tallies my total, she turns and asks, “What kinds of things do you put in the boxes?”
            “Well,” I answer, as I scan my credit card, “school supplies, hygiene items, toys--anything that will fit in a good-sized shoebox, really.”
            “Did you see the baseballs that are on sale?  There’s twelve in a case for a dollar!” she says in an incredulous voice. 
            “No! Do they have any more?  Where are they?”  I’m rapid-firing questions like some police interrogator.
            “I don’t know,” she admits, “but someone came through my line a little bit ago with a pack of them.  I couldn’t believe how cheap they were.” 
            I sign my name on the credit slip and heave the bags into my cart, oblivious to the crayon boxes scattering inside them as I concentrate on this new elusive treasure—twelve baseballs for a dollar!   I turn to the cashier, “Hey, thanks for telling me.  I’m gonna put these in the car and come back in to take a look.”  Then I turn to the woman in line behind me and add, “Thanks for being patient.”
            “No problem,” she smiles with a shake of her head.
            I hustle to the car, dump the crayons in the trunk, and speed-push my cart back through the entrance doors, ignoring the Wal-Mart greeter in my haste.  Breezing to the toy department, I cruise up and down the aisles with my clearance-tag-radar on high alert.  No flashes of red sale tags here.
            Next I beat it over to the sporting goods department.  Let’s see—golf balls, footballs—no baseballs.  Where next?  I round the corner, head into a main thoroughfare and nearly hit a display of bright yellow tennis balls. I glance up to read the price sign—YIKES! $1.00!  I pick up one of the shrink-wrapped packages and my eyes glow when I see that it holds THREE cans and each contains three brand-new, brand-name tennis balls—nine balls for only $1.00! 
            I start to salivate but am careful not to drool as I toss packages into my cart.  Wait a minute.  I need to be more organized or I won’t be able to fit them all in.  With a view toward space utilization, I neatly stack the packages and manage to fit all forty of them into my cart. 
            Now where are the baseballs?
            I use my calf muscles to overcome the heavy cart’s inertia and force it around the next corner.  Aha!  Here, with their red tags gleaming like diamonds in the sun, are a row of shelves full of clearance items.
            And on the second row I see them.  The baseballs.
            Nine packages remain—that’s nine dozen baseballs for only $9.00--and I move fast to balance them on top of Tennis Ball Mountain before someone else sees them and wants to buy a pack. 
            I struggle toward the cash registers, stopping every few feet to re-position my baseball pyramid.  Other shoppers turn to look, but I don’t care.  I won the jackpot.   As I push the cart back into the line of my friendly tip-sharing cashier buddy, a passing shopper comments, “You probably don’t even know how to play the game.”
            “Ha!  You’re right!” I giggle.  I’m not embarrassed.  I’m euphoric.
            Once again I start to toss my bounty onto the counter, and the cashier smiles.  “So, you found them,” she says.
            “Yep, and I found 360 tennis balls, too.  This is just such a blessing and an answer to prayer.  I pray every day to find things to put in these shoeboxes, and because of you, 468 kids will each have a new ball to play with.” 
            Her smile brightens up a few notches, “Well, I’m glad I could help.”
            I smile back. 
            We’re both having a ball.



Sunday, January 29, 2017

Days Fly By

Nothing much is supposed to happen in our Operation Christmas Child world in January. We don't even have to complete a monthly report for our team until February is over.  So why have the past few weeks seemed so busy?

Here's a little montage of what's been going on this month. On January 9th we had our first team meeting.  We celebrated the shoebox total God blessed us with in 2016.  The 50,306 boxes were a bit under our prayed-for goal of 51,500 but it was a victory nonetheless. We enjoyed praising Him together and sharing vision for 2017.

Two days later I made a trip to an outlying thrift store to collect 120 stuffed animals and did some shopping off and on through the next week to score some great items for our 2017 shoeboxes, including these cute red shoes.

The next week brought a few meetings with amazing good news of answered prayer--more storage available at a local church and a new Church Relations Coordinator for our team.

Then there was another delivery at our storage container.  God gave me a clear day for the delivery

And everything was going great with my efforts to get things reorganized in the container and get the new delivery stored until...the 10 cartons of toothbrushes I'd stacked toppled over on my head.

No harm, though--just had to do some restacking in the criss-cross log style.

A few days later we had another fun opportunity with a mini shoebox packing party and jump rope assembly session with some middle school students from our Erie City's Mission's Urban University program.  Pam and I set up for them to pack 25 boxes and they completed 800 jump ropes for next fall's packing party.

They viewed the video of shoebox recipient, Alex, who got his shoebox in Rwanda.  Alex later came to live in the US but years later returned to Rwanda and was able to visit and forgive the man who killed his relatives.  The students were really impacted by Alex's story and the chance to help children who are needier than they.

And...two days later I was off to this weekend's Mid-Atlantic Area Coordinators' Planning Summit.  What a blessing it was to celebrate our Mid-Atlantic shoebox number.

Again, we didn't quite reach the prayed-for goal of 1,255,255 but we praised God for the victory and spent lots of time learning about exciting new OCC initiatives that we pray will bring more shoeboxes to children waiting around the world.

Saturday night was especially exciting as we had the opportunity to hear from Dania, a shoebox recipient who received her shoebox in the middle east.  You can never tire of hearing these stories of how God miraculously provides for children and families through simple boxes.  Dania and her family prayed for a radio and you can guess what she received in her box.  Here's Dania in the middle and Jaki, another shoebox recipient, on the left.  I wanted to get a picture with them so I could feel tall.

Our area team formed in May of 2007, and that's when I became an area coordinator.  Since I'm not quite to that ten-year mark I was surprised to be presented with a plaque for ten years as an AC and humbled to realize God's graciously allowed our team to received almost 349,000 boxes in this decade.

It was hard to leave all the area coordinator friends I see so seldom, but God answered more prayer by keeping the roads dry until I hit the snow an hour from home.  January travel in northwestern PA is always unpredictable so it was a real blessing to have an easy trip.

When I settled in to check my email I found another surprise--an email from a 12-year old girl in Ukraine who received one of the boxes I packed last fall.  Those winter boots I picked up on sale found a good home with her.

God is so faithful and this flying-by month has certainly become more exciting.

Saturday, January 7, 2017

January Again

It's January. Again.

For many reasons I often struggle to find joy in January. It's the beginning of a new year that should have bright hope on the horizon.  Instead, I see myself back at the bottom of the mountain deciding where to even start to make the ascent. The year's challenges loom large and make me want to curl up under warm covers and hibernate.

In my Operation Christmas Child world there is change--some beloved staff members and volunteers have left and a few new ones have come.  Change is inevitable and embraced by some but generally not by me.  I like my status quo and, admittedly, would probably have also been content to stay in Egypt--thank you very much.

I've been trying to prepare for our first Operation Christmas Child area team meeting on Monday--in just two days.  So I looked up the ministry plan template for 2017 and found it's significantly changed. Did I say how I feel about change?  How do I figure out what my total number of team members was for 2015 and for 2016 when they come and go throughout the year?  I need to work to see change as improvement instead of just--dreaded change...

God's blessed me with so much lately--lots of shoebox items provided, for example. And I just spent a couple days watching live stream of the Passion 2017 conference--inspiring (but daunting.)

Still I struggle--especially with my sinful attitude toward a fellow Christian. I try to repent but can't seem to let go of this sin and give grace to this person. I pray. Well, I try to pray. God help me.

It's time to set our team's shoebox goal for 2017. I've been praying about that, too. God, will you show us what Your goal is? I'm so tempted to prognosticate based on the number of boxes we can see packed in our own power instead of trusting You for Your provision.  How do we measure 'immeasurably more'?

And yesterday I heard of another fellow OCC volunteer who is leaving. Quitting always looks so very tempting in January.  Almost every January.

If you're reading this, will you stop and say a quick prayer for Operation Christmas Child volunteers and staff and shoebox packers all over this country?  Pray for us to persevere if God is calling us to persevere--to throw off the sin that so easily besets us and run with patience the race that is set before us.

Because.  It's January.

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

You Just Never Know

I've been praying for more than a few weeks about this delivery of eight pallets of shoebox items coming for our 2017 Operation Christmas Child packing party and finally...

Today was the day...

Considering it is December 27 in Erie, PA, God answered our prayers for great weather. It was windy and 34 degrees but the pavement was dry and there was no snow when those eight pallets got dropped this morning.  And God provided an amazing crew of a lucky 13 volunteers to unload those pallets. just never know.

I was worried those pallets would be open boxes containing the 28,416 pairs of shoelaces and 10,950 belts.  I was prepared to put them into cartons for storage in the container.

As it turns out, the shoelaces not only arrived in individual small boxes but were also packed in even smaller boxes of six inside those outer boxes.  I knew they'd have to be removed from that packaging before the packing party.  I wasn't planning to do that today. just never know.

While I was opening and inspecting the three pallets of cartons of belts (also surprisingly in individual cartons instead of one big box) I wasn't really paying attention to the volunteers who were toting all those individual boxes of shoelaces into the church gym so they could begin opening them and putting them into larger cartons.

It feels like the storage container is shrinking.  We got the cases of belts stored for future processing.  They are great quality and fun colors but I'm worried that if we take them out of their compact packaging before the packing party they'll take up too much storage room.

Still pondering this belt dilemma, I walked into the gym to find the scene above that made me gulp. This impromptu work day was unanticipated and the piles of hundreds of boxes seemed
overwhelming. just never know.

Those busy volunteers kept working.  After a few hours they'd managed to box up about 10,000 of the 28,416 pairs of laces but it was apparent we couldn't finish this job today.  So we strategized about how to clean up and make plans to complete the job another time. Unopened boxes were toted back to the storage container and lined up against other items that also still need to be processed.  Thankfully, there's still a narrow walkway in the container.

Cardboard was broken down for recycling.  Pam filled her little blue car with cartons of different-sized cartons of purple shoelaces to take home to process.  We filled our van with cardboard and still more cartons of laces.

Those weeks of prayers were answered beyond what I ever anticipated.  Once again I look at the stacks in the storage container and realize there are nine more months until the packing party.  When I find the next big deal what will I do?  It's hard to imagine there's space for much more. just never know.

Friday, December 23, 2016

Last Minute Gifts

Now, how did I manage to let more than two weeks slip by without posting an update?  You know how busy it gets in this holiday season.

Since the last time I wrote we enjoyed a few days of volunteering at the Baltimore (BWI) Processing Center and even got the chance to inspect some boxes from right here in Northwestern PA.

It was hard to leave there at the end of our three days, but the leaving was soothed by a special gift we were able to pick up on our way home--a donation of over 3,000 new Beanie Babies.  They're not counted yet so I don't have an exact number.  It was wonderful how God worked out every detail of that pick-up.

Today I decided to give myself a last-minute gift.  I can procrastinate with the best of them, so over the years I've found a little trick to help me get motivated when I'm stalled.  I tell myself I'll do that task I've been dreading as a gift to myself.  I tell myself I'll clean the house so I can enjoy it.  I'll finish a project that's been hanging over my head and call it a gift to me.

So today I gave myself the gift of spending some time organizing in our storage container.  It was a bit warmer today (37 degrees) so I was able to make it for three hours.  My loving husband came to help me out for part of the time, and that made the work go much faster.

I feel so much better now that I've made some headway in counting and stashing at least some of the donations we got in early December.  Now I can separate packages of socks and count and store them as a real Christmas gift.

As a bonus, I'm more ready for next Tuesday's upcoming delivery of eight pallets of shoebox fillers.  We've been praying for this one for a few weeks now, and I'm eager to see how God will "part the waters" and bring all the volunteers we need and give us a good weather day to work outside.

Meanwhile, I think about the gift of the birth of our Savior.  It was no surprise to God that His Son was born in uncomfortable circumstances--surrounded by animals and stench.  Some of God's best gifts seem to come that way--out of not only discomfort but often real longing or pain.

So as we wait once more to celebrate that Holiest of nights let's praise Him for the hardships, the unmet expectations, the labor, and the muck of life that draws us to the best gift of all....

Him.  Only Him.